It's okay I'm different now. I'm different now. I'm different now.

general feelings of shifting shifting
shifting habits and intentions
living and working
and not working
and shifting

I haven't written or shared anything in 2 months.  I realize that I am
a) more disinterested in the "art conversation" than ever,
b) more interested in making art and figuring out what kind of art I want to make,
and c) generally on a different path than 3 years ago.

When I moved to Denver in 2009 with my partner, now husband, Christian, we came with optimism about developing our own architecture/development project in the city and we came with intention to positively contribute and participate in the art community.

The latter was easily accomplished with GroundSwell Gallery - the project of the last 3 years.  I don't mean "easily" as though the work was easy, rather I mean that the intention was accomplished.  I gave it my all and we've got 2 exhibitions to go before I'll walk away from our good gallery.  I'm shifting.

The former, the architecture and development is in the works.  We've got our first project half way under construction and plan to move in late April.  (See right margin for a link to that project on Christian's website).  The desire to contribute our best skills and most quality standards of aesthetics and lifestyle - happening.

So here I am doing what I wanted to do, having fulfilled a dream, shifting the ways of my life...
The beginning of 2013 rocked my world having had a major shock with the deaths of my sister in law and her new husband and unborn baby...  the first half of the year is decidedly a true blur.  The rest of 2013 brought a realization that I don't need to run our altruistic gallery anymore, brought major change in the type of artwork and approach to art-making that I do, and much learning about letting go, grieving and stepping into the present.

I am shifted.  I am shifting.  The artwork that I now make is more about curiosity and discovery, self awareness and self care.  I don't know how else to describe it, but I promise to share more images of what I'm doing.  For our bed, I am working on a large quilt (I believe I've posted about this project), which speaks to the design philosophy of Anni Albers and also the relationship color has with us as dreamers.  I've been making many drawings that are directly related to visions from dreams and from moments of epiphany.  Because of the work I am doing with my psychotherapist, I realize I have visions, and I've become increasingly aware of the direct correlations between my visual mind and my life's narrative.  In all, I've made 7 drawings and I'll probably make more of what I'm calling the "Primary Platonic" drawings. 

The drawing board.

optimism revisited

Created by John D. Boswell, these remixes introced by PBS digital studios of a few old PBS favorites are super entertaining to me.  I think what's most appealing is the nostalgia for a childhood feeling of optimistic possibility and the your-dreams-can-come-true era of the 80s and 90s.  It was a great big and ambiguous feeling then (and it still is in a lot of ways), but it was inspiring, and I guess we eventually realized we had to be innovative and creative to clarify all those ambiguities.  It was Reading-Rainbow-good.  During that time of only 10 - 20 television stations and limited programming, PBS held down a motivating, inspiring, the sky's the limit attitude and I guess I can trace a lot of my optimism and feelings of hopefulness about life back to that (ok, I'll give my parents and some of my public school teachers a lot of credit too).  It was a general attitude of coaching our country's children into believing in themselves and believing in their middle-class dreams.  Not bad.  Thanks PBS.  ...really.